Feelings are complicated!
by Nayalover97
Summary: Pezberry! Oneshot! Santana wants to tell Rachel about her feelings! Smut!


**A/N: First attempt for smut, so I hope you guys like.** **Also I didn't read over if there are any mistakes it's because I'm tired xDD**

I was waiting for her.

She said she will be home in thirty minutes.

So I waited …. and waited. I wanted to tell her something really important but I still didn't know how, so I took the time to think about all of this shit again. I mean who will I blame I'm the one who messed up, if I wasn't the one who developed feelings for her, then who else. I really want to punch me in the face because I'm so stupid to think that she will even return my feelings…..This is probably because I'm so scared. Yeah you heard right the Santana Lopez is scared, ok I probably was scared too when I told my abuela that I am gay ….. Omg… I'm rambling in my thoughts maybe I just stop thinking for a while it's probably for the best.

Just then my phone vibrates. I jumped a little because it took me by surprise. I unlock my phone and read the text.

It's from Lady Hummel, he said that he can't make it for dinner. Okay whatever …. it's not like I didn't knew it before. Of course I reply and ask him why he hadn't has time.

Gunther asked him to come to the diner of course. As for the diner I don't know if I can go in there like nothing had happen, I mean she probably hates me now. I'm speaking of Dani I broke up with her yesterday because of Rachel, I really do loved her but she wasn't 'it', it was nice but …. yeah you get the point. I still hope we can remain friends, because she really means something to me … but she didn't replied to my texts and calls, I get she is upset and I give her time till she is ready. But as for now I really have to put my shifts so that they don't cross Dani's. She was so sad and angry and then she cried my heart broke by that I just wanted to took her in my arms and soothe her but I couldn't I turned around and left.

I hear the door unlock and freeze in my spot. Now i can't even think straight I thought I still have enough time to prepare for this. But I guess I was wrong … oh so wrong.

And the door is open.

"Hey Santana, I'm home …. hmmm it smells really good … did you cook?" Rachel asks as she takes of her jacket and hangs it on the coat hook. She likes how it smells …good right?

"Hey Rach yeah I did." I answer and I was a little nervous as she comes into the living room. She looks beautiful like always.

"You're sweet … but you cooked vegan right? Because if you not, you know I don't eat it even if it smells sooo good and you know I want to eat the things that smells good, especially when you cooked it …." She rambles and it's too cute when she does this, but most of the time now in New York it doesn't happen that often and although it really annoyed me in high school and still does, sometimes I miss it because she changed so much and it's a good thing because I love how her style is now, it's really hot and stuff, not these ugly animal sweaters and skirts …. but sometimes I miss the old Rachel Berry … but whatever.

"Yeah it is vegan and I hope you like it because it was not that easy." I wink at her and she smiles. My cheeks turn a deep red, I don't even know why … her smile is just soo overwhelming especially when it's just for me.

"Ohh… ok I'm sure I will like it." She says and we both go to the dining table.

"How were rehearsals?" She just took a bit so I have to wait.

"Umm … they were good, actually the director said that I am a natural talent." She smiles that 1000 watt smile of hers and I have to chuckle because everyone knows that she is a natural talent and she herself said it all the time in glee but New York changed her and her confidence it's not that strong anymore.

"Ohh if he didn't knew that from the beginning then he is an idiot, because everyone knows that Rachel Berry is a natural talent." Her eyes go wide and her mouth opens and closes and opens again. I chuckle again.

"Santana Lopez, we do not curse in this household." I was a little shocked because really 'idiot' but then her features soften and a small smile graces her lips.

"And thank you." I laughed a little because really how cute can she be.

We finished our dinner and went to the living room.

Now we sit side by side on the couch watching TV. Her head rests on my shoulder, I knew that she would be exhausted I mean after a long day of rehearsals and shit … i would be too.

So I stroke her hair a little.

She moans here and there because it's a good feeling I guess.

After a while of thinking I hear her snore … she can't sleep no.

I have to talk to her I can't wait till tomorrow I know it sounds cruel to wake a sleeping beauty but i have to.

"Umm … Rachel?" I asked quietly. She mumbles a little but it does sound like that she is not fully awake yet.

"Rachel …are you awake?"I asked a little louder.

"Hmm … what?"

"I'm sorry but I have to talk to you about something important." By that she is fully awake and sits straight up.

"No problem … you seem nervous Honey, what do you want to talk about?" She asked.

"I am nervous … but ok. Rachel I …. I don't know how I should say that…. Rachel I developed feelings for you, for a long time now and I was so nervous to tell you that I just let it be, but somehow I knew i had to tell so what do you say?" I am nervous as hell, what will she say omg.

"What do you mean you have feelings for me?" She asked and I can tell that she is really confused.

"I mean that I like you like more than a friend but like a girlfriend … "

"You mean… wow, but what about Dani I thought you two are madly in love."

"I broke up with her, I mean I love her but more like a friend yeah." I explained and she nods her head in understanding.

"How long?" She asks out of nowhere, I'm a little taken aback.

"What how long?"

"How long have you had feelings for me?" Ohhh …. should I be honest it's probably for the best.

"I don't know exactly but I think way back in high school, but I realized it here in New York." I answer honestly.

"Okay." After awhile of thinking she adds." But you were with Brittany omg I am so confused right now."

We sit there awhile both in our thought when she suddenly mumbles something which I can't quit understand, but on the look on her face I can see that it's something that slightly embarrassing for her.

"What did you just said?" I asked.

"I just I never … and you know … I just never mind." She says and hides her face in her hands.

"What … okay you can tell me you now after all I just told you that I have feelings for you so whatever." I say encouragingly.

"Okay …. maybe, can I kiss you?" She asked her head still in her hands, it's so cute how nervous she is.

"Umm of course." I answer, I wanted to kiss her since forever, I don't care if it's just a peck. But after all I'm a little surprised she knows now that I like her and she asked me if I kiss her.

She slowly puts her hands from her face and stares me in my eyes. She probably needs certainty to do the next step so I nod my head and lean a little this is enough for her and she leans closer too. Our faces are mere centimeter apart, I can already feel her breath on my face face, I am so nervous and I can see that she is too.

I lean a little closer and our lips meet. It's an unbelievable feeling her lips are so soft they melt perfectly with mine.

Slowly I put my hands on her waist and pull her a little closer to which she doesn't protest quite the reverse she places her hands behind my neck and pulls me closer too. After awhile we break apart but we remain close bodies pressed together.

"Wow." She breath out, and I can just nod and smile like crazy, that was by far the best kiss I've ever received and it wasn't a long one.

She smiles too and if we had both the same idea lean in again.

This kiss is different, it is not sweet and innocent like the one before it's more heated and exploring. When I feel her tongue grace my lips I can just moan I never in a million times thought this could happen. Of course I let her in and our tongues dance with each other like never before. Then my hands wander they explore every inch of her and she doesn't mind because she does the same to me. Sometime in between the kiss she somehow managed to straddle my lap and is now grinding down on me. My hands find their way under her shirt and her skin is so soft and flawless. I pull on the hem of her shirt to ask if I can take it of without an answer she put her arms up and that is enough for me so I pull it over her head and throw it somewhere in the apartment. I take a moment to appreciate her body, it's not like I never seen her topless but this is different, she is so beautiful and sexy, I want her and when I look up in her face I can also see the want there. So we somehow ended up completely naked on the couch Kurt will be happy.

"I really want to take you right here but I suggest we go to my bedroom, if you don't mind." She just nods against my neck and kiss and sucks further on. I take that as a yes and stand with her in my arms up. She weighs almost nothing so it is nor problem to take her to my bedroom. I gently lay her down and lay on top of her.

She looks me straight in the eyes and I kiss her hard then I go to her jawline kiss and nibble there.

I go a little lower to her collarbone kiss her there and caress her skin she moans here and there and I decided that this is probably the most beautiful sound I've ever heard.

I reached her breast and slowly kissed around her nipple. She whimpers because she wants me definitely not around it she wants me on it.

So I do this at first I kissed it a little then I suck it into my mouth with my hand I pinch and caress the other one she writhe for my touch. But I kiss my way down to her stomach at first.

Then I am at my destination her center her really wet center, I run one finger through her lips and she moans.

"More…" She whines.

"What Baby … tell what do you want?" I teas her.

"I want you to eat me out and fuck me, please." she pleads and I lean in and run my tongue through her slit …. she tastes amazing, I can't get enough.

But she wants more I can feel it how she has her nails in my hair or her heels in back it isn't enough so I lick a little higher and suck her clit into my mouth.

"Fuck ….Ohhh my god. That feels amazing." She curses and I chuckle.

I draw patters on her clit and sucked the life out of it but she needs more so I put two fingers in her tight channel.

She cries out again.

"Ohh my god … I'm going to come." And with that said she comes with a lout cry of my name on her lips I pump and suck a little more to let the rest of her orgasm comes over her.

I slowly climb up and on my face and just smile down at her. She is so beautiful especially when she comes.

"Ahh before I forget it Rachel I thought we don't curse in our household?" I ask her and she glared at me.

"Uh .. shut up." I just chuckle. She tries to crawl over me but I don't let.

"What are you trying to do?" I asked her.

"Return the favor?" She asked confused and yawns.

"Ohh baby you are too tired let's just sleep you can tomorrow if you want." I say and she pouts but I just kiss the pout away and put the blanket over us. She doesn't protest further, she just curled into my side softly dozes off.

And I for once truly feel happy for a long time.


End file.
